Growth is painful. Change is painful. But, nothing is as painful as staying stuck where you do not belong ~ N. R. Narayana Murthy
The word itself feels like a dirty word rolling off my tongue. Almost as if I should excuse myself or apologize after using it. It’s a word that evokes all sorts of emotions for me, including dread, anxiety, anticipation, and grief. It’s an inevitable part of all aspects of life, yet remains a dirty word, one that conjures fear and avoidance.
Why does a simple, common word cause such a reaction?
Winter changes slowly into summer and I welcome that change.
As a nurse, change was my mainstay. Everything was in a constant state of flux. Patient conditions, treatment options, policies and procedures were fluid, dynamic, evolving. Shift and staffing models, the way of doing business and the way we did our business never stayed still, it was always changing. Many struggled, for me I expected, anticipated and embraced this change. It was my work world, it was my job, my profession, it was easy.
In my personal world, change is so much more unexpected, traditionally catching me off guard. Shouldn’t everything and everyone stay the same?
If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading ~ Lao Tzu
All growth involves change. Changing attitudes, beliefs, ways of thinking, being, doing. Change of career, change of path, change of the people surrounding you. And all change brings grief.
Change management theory has equated change to the stages of grief, the ones by Kubler-Ross. In any world, work or personal, we need to give ourselves, and others permission and time to griebe the change and the loss of what once was. Not all change is bad, but even positive change means the end of something. And that end is grieved. In grief, we often start in denial, and go through bargaining, anger, depression and acceptance. We bounce around and definitely don’t move in any defined order for any set length of time.
Perhaps allowing time to grieve what once was will allow for a greater acceptance and understanding of what now is. And really, how things are now won’t last forever, this too will change.
Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything ~ George Bernard Shaw